Showing Up In Your Business As You Are (Right Now)

Showing up in the online business world can be a challenge for so many of us, making us shrink back and think things like, “When I get some more clients, I can record a video,” or “When I lose some of this weight, I can get those photos taken.”

But what if we could figure out how to just show up, right here, right now, as we are in our businesses?

I recently went to my first in-person business retreat and, while I was there, had professional photos taken.

If you’ve never had professional photos taken of yourself, they can be HARD to look at. In fact, I know several people who cried when they first looked at their brand new images – photos which they had only weeks before been incredibly excited for.

Don’t get me wrong, some people have amazing experiences and love their photos immediately, especially if they’re used to seeing themselves in a lot of pictures.

I knew going into the shoot that my pictures would be challenging for me to see (more on that in a bit). But it didn’t help matters much when the photographer showed me the first up close, untouched digital images right in the middle of taking them on a giant 60+ inch television screen.

I literally gasped in horror.

“Is THAT what I actually look like?”

And those weren’t even the full body images yet. *Ugh*

In the online business world, there are so many business owners showing off gorgeous professional photos and fun, playful videos of themselves on social media, their websites, and all of their marketing materials.

And I really wanted to be that person too. But by the time I got my photos after the shoot, I was less than thrilled to share my new images in public.

I know that I’m not the only one who struggles with putting themselves out there in their business – and I’m not just talking about images. There are lots of people who are uncomfortable on video, consultation calls, or podcast interviews, all of the things that we’re “supposed to” be doing to build a successful business.

So I want to talk about showing up in your business and the challenges I faced when showing up, along with some of the things we can do to start becoming okay with where we are right now.

A little of my story.

If you’ve followed me on social media at all (especially for anyone directly connected with me on Facebook), I’ve not kept it very secret that I have struggled for a very long time with my body image.

Since I was a child, I’ve struggled with my weight, and existing in a world that is not always the kindest to those of us in larger bodies, I was reminded consistently that I didn’t “fit” in all sorts of ways.

The last decade or so has been the hardest for my body image as I’ve moved into a body that is the heaviest I’ve lived in.

I’d found myself during this time making sure I kept my camera at certain angles during my Zoom meetings with clients and not wanting to record any of the b-roll videos of me working at my desk requested by my marketing assistant because people would see just how big I was.

On a personal level, I left the Bay Area nearly seven years ago to do some serious self-care, and during that time, though I did an incredible amount of work on my mental health and started an amazingly successful business, I also gained a lot of weight. In my mind, the added weight lessened the success I had found in other areas of my life. Since I left my entire life to take care of myself, shouldn’t I have lost weight too?

That embarrassment and self-body shame kept me from going back and visiting my dearest friends and chosen family, and from showing up at any local in-person networking events, let alone even considering traveling to meet clients in person.

So as this year began and I had a team who wanted to meet in person for a team retreat and a client I adored and respected who wanted me to join her in person at her retreat, I knew I needed to do something to get out of my own way.

Stepping Up

Since my challenge had to do with others seeing my body in all its beautiful glory, I began working with an amazing woman, Loralee Dodson, who is a Health & Lifestyle Coach. I turned to her because I had worked with her briefly in the past and she had a beautiful and gentle yet strong way of helping me reframe my thoughts. Additionally, she used to be a trainer and is body-positive. All of that together made me feel safe sharing these vulnerable thoughts and fears with her.

The goal was to truly look at what was holding me back. Through a lot of work – thought exploration and awareness, honest conversation, separating out old stories, understanding my own biases, a LOT of vulnerability, taking pictures of myself every day in the mirror, and more – I was able to get to a point where I was EXCITED to travel and meet people I adored in person and my fear of getting the photos taken was much less.

Once I received the full-body pictures, it was still just as hard as I imagined, however. But I continued my work with these images in hand. I sat with Loralee and looked at my body with neutrality and appreciation for its various shapes. I also printed out my photos and put them around my home so that I could see myself every day and begin to normalize looking at myself.

Sharing these photos is still a bit challenging for me. I get a small knot in my stomach when I click “share” or “send.” But all of these steps have started me on the road to showing up and sharing photos of my full body publicly.

For now, I still see many things I don’t love. But I also see my joy shine through, my handmade jewelry that I created, a cute dress with pockets, and a body that has carried me through a life full of stunning ups and horrifying downs and is still enabling me to experience this crazy life. I know that it can only continue to get better the more I continue to show up.

How You Can Show Up

So what about you? Where do you struggle to show up in your business?

One thing that is important to remember is that there is no “have to.” You get to decide when, where, and how you want to show up. No one pushed me to meet people in person or have photos taken and post them online. I decided that it felt like the right time for me and a sensible next step in my own growth and progress.

If you don’t want to do videos on TikTok, don’t! If you don’t feel comfortable at in-person networking events and don’t see the benefit of them for your specific business, skip ‘em.

What do you feel ready to do in your business?

Are you ready to start your own podcast but are uncomfortable talking without a script?

Start with a script and read from it. Then move down to bullet points. Or stick with always using a script. Remember, the only rules are the ones you impose on yourself.

Try to understand what is scary or uncomfortable about what you want to do. What is truly holding you back? And then take small steps to make that change. Find a coach, therapist, or colleague depending on what you’re struggling with.

Don’t be afraid to ask for help, and try not to beat yourself up for taking small steps.

Be okay with where you are right now and take the steps you need to start showing up in the ways you want without waiting for something else to change.

I’ll be standing right next to you with my full body in a cute dress with pockets.

You got this!

See you out there!